The 3 Biggest Mistakes You’re Making On First Dates
Many people make these same mistakes especially on first dates. A date should be fun but also authentic. Finding the best future partner means you’re going to have to treat this like an audition. You’re auditioning the other person and also yourself. That’s why you’re going to want to avoid doing these three things that will sabotage your dates.
Don’t try to be something you’re not
Most people want to make a good impression on a first date and that’s not a bad thing in itself. Dressing up nice, going to a nice place together, and being polite are all musts on a first date. But one big thing that you mustn’t do is to try and be someone you’re not just to impress your date.
If they ask if you like something that they are fond of don’t lie and say you like it when you don’t. Nobody can maintain being inauthentic forever and at one point if you start dating them seriously they’re going to find out that really you don’t love cooking like they do, or you’re not into going on a two week outdoors fishing holiday.
Be polite but also be who you are always. Your date should fall in love with the real you and not whatever version you put across to impress them. Be authentic no matter what. It’ll help weed out the dates that aren’t right for you and to make the date who is right fall even harder in love with you.
Don’t play it cool
Many people ruin their chances by not being open after a date about how they feel. If you want another date tell them straightaway!
People like to know that they are liked. People hate uncertainty. The simple act of expressing you like your date is going to make it more likely that they’ll like you back. It avoids all of the “did they like me or not?” after date speculation. The key here is to have the bravery to go for it. If you’re too shy to tell them before you say goodbye at the end of the date then message them afterwards quickly. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, a simple “I really enjoyed our date, do you have plans for this weekend? It’d be great to see you again.” will work well.
Keep in mind that when people are dating they are going on many dates. If your date goes really well and you like them then you’re going to want to take them off the market as soon as possible. The best people come onto the dating market much more rarely so when you come across an amazing person you have to act decisively.
Never drink alcohol on a date
You might be looking at this one nervously. I know many people like to have a little drink of alcohol on a date and that’s ok. But here’s why it’s going to mess up your dating: It’s going to impede your focus and your intuitions.
On a date, especially a first date, you need to be paying attention and evaluating who the person is across the table from you. You need to be really listening to what they’re saying to you as well as asking the important questions you’re going to want to know the answers to.
If you’re nervous like most people get on a first date it’s far easier to accidentally get tipsy or even worse a bit drunk as you lose track of how much wine you’re sipping while talking. To make it easier for yourself order anything non-alcoholic and sip on that instead. The simple act of sipping on tea or fruit juice is going to soothe you when you’re nervous.
If you’re worried about how your date will respond to you not drinking alcohol tell them you have work in the morning or suggest a place such as a café where alcohol isn’t served. It’s a massive red flag if your date has a problem with you not drinking alcohol on a date so if they do act weird about it then take note!
In summary, when on dates remember to be yourself, keep a clear head by keeping sober, and when you meet the right person act decisively. These rules will keep you on the right path to finding the best partner for you.
